


October Rain

by DarkDianora



Category: Adam Lambert (Musician)
Genre: M/M, Threesome - M/M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-10-29
Updated: 2011-11-03
Packaged: 2017-10-25 01:37:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,926
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/270286
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DarkDianora/pseuds/DarkDianora
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tommy's birthday's looming. A time to look at his life and take stock.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Prompted by the unpleasantness on twitter - and my upcoming birthday, one day after Tommy's. :)

17th of October.  The new Justin Bieber CD came out today.  Does that kid even need to work anymore?  Probably not, and he isn’t yet twenty.  And I?  I’m going to be thirty tomorrow, and ten years from now I’m going to be forty, and people will remember me as the straight guy that got kissed by Adam Lambert.  If they remember me at all.

So I’ve been a bit depressed lately.  Adam says it’s normal, a reaction to turning thirty, but what does he know?  He’s only twenty-nine.  I’ve been listening to him whining about how he’s going to be fat, wrinkly, jaded and what-not for two years straight now, can’t he listen to me for once without throwing condescending, overbearing shit at me?

This?  Is not normal.  I know myself.  I mean, okay, I worry about my looks, but I’m not the kind of guy to go looking for the first grey hair or shit, right?  I don’t mind growing older, cause what’s the alternative?  Yeah, exactly.

It’s just, beginning a new decade is something like New Year’s Eve - you look back, take stock, and you look ahead and try to gauge where you’re going.  And that’s the problem.  I feel like I’ve been on a roller-coaster for two years, and I’ve got all the loopings and crazy turns behind me, and the only thing left is just maybe a ride through a tunnel, and then the slow petering-out of the wagon.

Which is strange, ‘cause it’s not as if I got a lull ahead of me.  The next tour’s about to start in a couple of weeks, and really, we’re busy like hell practicing moves and choreo.  Adam’s voice is top and the array of songs covers everything from down and dirty rock to heart-breaking ballads.  The expectations were so high, it was a bit daunting, I thought, and so much depended on this album.  As it is, I was worried for nothing.  Of course it was a success.

It was exhilarating to see the weights tumble from Adam’s chest during the first two weeks after the release when it very fast became obvious how much of a success this was going to be.  Everybody is being dragged along with that maelstrom, spirits are flying high.

Adam’s so damn excited about the oncoming tour, which songs we’re going to perform, what we’re going to do on stage…

Do you know where this is heading?  Yeah, I think you do.  The damned kiss.

Monte thinks it’s funny.  He keeps humming that Casablanca song at me.  _…You must remember this, a kiss is just a kiss…_   Just a kiss.  Yeah, right.  Asshole.  There’s no such thing as just a kiss.  Not in my book.  If it doesn’t mean a thing, it’s not a kiss, it’s gymnastics.  And it’s no big secret that I’m so not into sports.

So, okay.  I’ll admit it.  It was more than fan service, on both our parts.  I’ve enjoyed every second of our kisses, and more often than not they’ve left me breathless and with my knees weak and shaking.  And it was pretty much obvious to me and everyone with eyes in their heads that Adam was affected, too.  Looking back, it’s strange that we never went further.  But Adam never asked, and I was too much of a ninny to ever offer, okay?

Now that Sauli’s in the picture it’s a moot point anyway.  At least that’s what I thought.  Turns out, there’s a considerable number of fans who, like, insist on Adam and I kissing.  On the other hand, there’s a smaller number who want to have Sauli on stage for a kiss.  How crazy is that?  Sure, he’s a major part of Adam’s life, but he’s got nothing to do with all things music.  Why don’t they just ask Adam to put a vid of him and Sauli fucking on fucking YouTube?

Adam, considerate guy that he is, has asked me, of course.  About my opinion, and if I’d mind kissing him again.  I think I gaped at him like my brain was AWOL or something.  And when I’d gotten over the shock I told him it was his decision, and that I’d go along with everything.

*deep breath*

That was about a month ago.  He hasn’t said anything yet and the waiting is slowly killing me.  Sometimes I imagine what would have happened if I had told him the truth.  Sure, Adam, of course you can kiss me.  Anytime, love.  I live and breathe for it.  I dream about your kisses.  When you touch me you set me on fire.  I want your kisses, I want your hands grabbing my hair, yanking me toward you.  I want to feel your hard cock pressed against mine.  God, I want to fall on my knees before you and tongue you through the denim of your pants.  I want to--

I sob and bury my face in my hands.  Nothing like this is going to happen.  Never ever again.  It’s a lose/lose situation for me.  The wagon’s going through a tunnel all right, but there’s no light at the end of it.  Not for me.

 


	2. Chapter 2

He was in the middle of the second set of crunch-ups when his cell began to ring.  For a second he flopped down, drawing deep, fast breaths.  Then he turned onto his stomach and robbed to the shaggy carpet where the damn nuisance was lying.

“S’up,” he huffed, already annoyed.  People who had his number knew what he was doing at this hour, and they damn-well knew not to disturb him while he was at it.  As much as he loved being in shape, he hated getting there.

“Tommy’s gone,” Monte’s familiar voice rumbled.

“Gone where?” Adam asked stupidly, before he caught on.  “You mean, he’s disappeared?”  For a second, he was dumb-struck, but he recovered fast.  As if Tommy would just run out on him!  No way!  “He’ll be away for the weekend,” he said to Monte.  “Or jamming with a couple of guys, Dave or Ravi.  Probably just forgot to tell somebody.”

“There’s a letter,” Monte said hesitantly.  “Found it in his flat this morning.  It was addressed to you, but I was worried, so I looked at it.  He says he’s not coming back.”

“No,” Adam said, suddenly feeling as if somebody had pulled the rug from under his feet.  “No, that’s not possible.  You must have got that wrong.”

“He’s left, Adam.  His things are gone.  You need to start thinking about getting a new bass player, it’s only three weeks till the tour starts.”

“We won’t need a new bass player.  We’re going to look for Tommy and we’re going to find him and get him back.”  With that, Adam flipped his cell shut.

For a few minutes he remained lying on the carpet, still out of breath.  After a while he got up, took a towel and wiped his face and arms dry.  Only then did he really register the importance of Monte’s words, and with a yelled “Fuck!” he flung the wet towel on the tiles.

Sauli appeared in the open kitchen door.  “Something wrong, Adam?”

“Tommy’s gone,” Adam said.  His voice sounded strange in his own ears, flat and hollow.

Sauli blinked.  Then he asked, “For good?”

Adam could only look at him quizzically.  Sometimes Sauli’s English was a bit wonky.

Sauli tried again.  “I mean, is he gone for good?  Isn’t that the expression?”

Adam shook his head.  “Yeah, that’s the expression, sure, but it kind of implies you’re happy to see him gone.  I don’t think that’s what you wanted to say, right?”

Looking embarrassed, Sauli nodded.  “What are you going to do now?  This is a bad time for him to go, isn’t it, with the tour and all?  You need a new bass player now.  That won’t be easy.”

He stepped closer to Adam, about to hug him, but Adam pulled back, suddenly feeling unaccountably tetchy.  “Why is that the first thing everybody thinks about - a new bass player?  What about Tommy?”

Sauli crossed his arms in front of his chest defensively.  “Tommy’s a grown-up.  He makes his own decisions.  You’re not responsible for him,” he remarked, sounding reasonable.

Sauli’s words only worked to make Adam’s irritation grow.  “He’s my friend.  Of course I am responsible for him.  He wouldn’t have left like that if something wasn’t very, very wrong.  I need to find him and see what’s going on.”

“But the tour…”

“Fuck the tour.  There will be no tour without him.  It wouldn’t be the same, and it wouldn’t work.”

Now Sauli looked upset, too.  “It’s always about him, is it?  Why is he so important?  If you need someone to make out with on stage, you could always kiss me, you know.”

Adam stared at his lover, unable to believe he’d heard right.  “Kiss you?  On stage?  I thought you wanted to be part of my life, Sauli.  Not part of the show.”

Sauli swallowed, his eyes directed everywhere but at Adam.  Adam saw a slight tremor run through him, and suddenly he had a rather bad feeling about where this was going.

Finally, Sauli looked back up at him.  “How can I be part of your life when you’re thinking more about kissing Tommy than about kissing me,” he said quietly.  His face was pale, his blue eyes shuttered, as he pushed past Adam and walked out of the kitchen.

“Sauli, no!” Adam exclaimed, reaching out to hold him back, but he only managed to knock over the Chinese vase Leila had given them when Sauli had moved in.  And then he could only watch helplessly as it slowly tilted over and crashed to the floor where it shattered into a million pieces.  He was still staring at them, emotions warring in his chest, when there was another crash as the front door slammed shut.

Not believing he’d heard right, Adam ran to the entrance hall, his feet crunching the shards to dust where he stepped on them, and tore the door open, just in time to see the tail end of Sauli’s rental disappear around the corner of his driveway.  He took a few jogging steps after him, but soon realized the futility of it.

In a complete daze he walked back into the living room and slumped down on a chair.  For a long time he sat there unmoving, his work-out clothes clinging to his clammy skin.  The air condition was blowing down on him, mercilessly cold, but he was unable to drag as much as a blanket over his shivering body.  Swallowing against the sudden lump in his throat, Adam closed his eyes.  Tommy was gone.  Tommy, who was like a brother to him…  More than a brother, to be honest.  And Sauli, his lover, had left him, too.  Gone, both of them.

 _Two in one day--that’s a record, Lambert._   _Even for you._

From the kitchen he heard the clock ring eleven times.  A bitter laugh escaped his throat.  How was it that his life had turned into this total mess in a matter of mere minutes?  And why did he feel as if it all was his own damn fault?


	3. Chapter 3

He’d been standing there for hours, it seemed, leaning against the wall, working hard at looking relaxed.  The music was loud, deafeningly so, and the driving beats made the splintery wood vibrate against his vertebrae.  His left hand was jammed deep into the front pocket of his tight black jeans, in his right he held the bottle he was nursing.  It was his fifth one already, but so far there was none of that pleasant glow he’d expected.  Only a growing sense of disorientation.

In front of him, the dance floor was packed with half-naked, writhing bodies, caught in stills by the stroboscope light.  Watching them made his head spin, yet he couldn’t tear his eyes away from the rippling sixpacks and sweat-shiny pecs, the occasional pierced nipple.  What was it with the gay community that caused this crazy rat race for perfection?  When had youth become the measure of a man?

He shook his head and took another sip of his beer.  The stuff was tepid after all this time he’d been clutching the bottle, but he wanted to at least look a little bit like he was having fun.  From the absolute lack of looks going his way, he was fooling no one.  In fact, people made a wide berth around him as if his misery was catching.

And to think that he’d been worried about being recognized!  He’d even shaved his hair into a Mohawk and dyed it black, just because he wanted to be left in peace.  No one was throwing him a second look now, and somehow that rankled, too.

The urge to flee became overwhelming.  With shaky hands he set his half-drunk bottle down next to the wall and turned to leave.  Only then the DJ suddenly did something right, and the unmistakable intro of “Another One Bites the Dust” rang from the speakers.  He was no dancer, never had been, his inhibitions always too great to just let go and have fun, but now he was drawn forward like by invisible strings, and he pushed through the teeming bodies right to the center of the dancefloor.

He started out slow, controlled, trying not to bump into anyone.  But it was impossible to avoid contact, most of the dancers were too far gone and nobody seemed to care anyway.  In the end he closed his eyes and let himself be carried along with the tide, for once not caring who watched and if he looked silly.  The freedom of it was exhilarating.

He lost completely track of time.  At one point he got rid of his sweat-soaked tee, pulling it over his head and flinging it away.  So what if he was a scrawny runt – he had it on good authority that some people liked exactly that.  He shook his head in exasperation, banning all thoughts of Adam firmly from his head.  Tonight was for him, and for him only.

It was during ‘Personal Jesus’, another stroke of genius from the DJ, that he slowly became aware of a presence behind him.  It was the eeriest feeling: a sensation of warmth, accompanied by a weird tingling as if the space between their bodies was brimming with electricity.  Just as his own breathing was speeding up he felt a soft touch at his naked shoulder.  A shudder racing down his spine, he swallowed hard and took a tentative step back.

Warm hands caught him by the hips and pulled him in, against a smooth naked torso and an unmistakable erection against which he couldn’t help but push back.  A muffled groan rewarded him, right next to his ear, and then a mouth slowly began to nuzzle the sensitive skin below it.  Every now and then the mouth pulled back, and then he felt the breeze of a soft exhale ghost over his wet, tingling flesh.  It made him break out in gooseflesh all over.  Caught in a haze, he had no idea what he was doing.  He only knew that it felt absolutely, 100% right.

The hands that held him wandered higher, tracing the bow of his ribs, gentle, but insistent, and he waited for the first inkling of a tickle, but it never came and with a shaky breath he relaxed further.

The person who he was leaning against couldn’t be much taller than him, if at all; their bodies were flush against each other, gyrating in the same slow rhythm.  Even their panting was in synch, getting heavier.  The hands were on his pecs now, playing with his nipples.  They were a little rough, but not cruelly so, and Tommy was caught in a dilemma between wanting to grind back into that burning erection and pushing forward against those clever, insistent fingers.

Suddenly an arm wrapped itself around his waist, holding him firmly in place, and the other hand glided downward, ever so slowly, and he knew where it was going, and he knew the kind of spectacle they were providing for everyone watching, but he was damned if he cared.  This, the two of them, was real.  The others…  Fuck them.

He let his head fall back against the other guy, almost feverish with anticipation.  The hand crept over his naked belly and stayed there, creating such a sensation of heat that his knees buckled.

“Please,” he muttered, pushing back.  “More!”

“Not here,” a husky voice whispered in his ear, and when he had processed that, he nodded jerkily, grabbed the guy’s hand and dragged him off the dance floor and out onto the street, never stopping to look back.  Outside, though, they were greeted by a shower of torrential rain that drenched them within seconds.  Breathless and giggling, they hovered on the sidewalk, swaying in place, and suddenly Tommy had a feeling like he was caught in a weird remake of Bonnie and Clyde.

“Where to?” he asked, blinking drops out of his eyes.

The other man gave his hand a tug.  “I’ve got a car close by.  Come on!”

As they jogged along, Tommy threw a quick sideways look at his companion, but the next street light was a way off and with the rain coming in almost horizontally he couldn’t see much.  Only a man with a built similar to his own, slender and wiry, with dark, spiky hair.  Something about his posture seemed vaguely familiar for a moment, but Tommy couldn’t pin it down.

They reached a red convertible, whose hard-top thankfully was in place, and jumped in.

The other man started the engine and veered onto the street.  The heating was set to max and going full power, still the windscreen fogged over in seconds.  Muttering a curse, the driver pulled to the side.

“There’s a rag in the glove compartment.  Throw it over, please.”

Tommy opened the box and rummaged around in it.  It was stuffed full with things.  He felt condoms, little packets of lube, but nothing that felt remotely like a cloth.

“Can you switch the light on?  I can’t see shit.”

The dome light came on and with a bit of fumbling Tommy managed to get a wiping cloth from the compartment’s depths.  He turned to the driver, about to give it to him, when he caught his first clear look on the guy’s face.

What the--  Tommy almost caught whiplash, his head jerked around so fast, and then he could only stare.  He blinked and looked again.  The image stayed the same.  Sitting next to him was the last guy he wanted to see.  Well, maybe the second to last.  Fuck.

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” he roared, feeling as if he’d been dunked in ice water.  “Is this your idea of fun, or what?”

“Don’t be mad,” Sauli said, “Believe me, this is nothing I planned.  I didn’t even recognize you at first.  And when I did--” he broke off, shook his head and started anew.  “Tommy, I really think we need to talk.”

His grey eyes were insistent on Tommy’s face, almost making him cave in, but then Tommy’s gaze fell on Sauli’s lips and the flashback of how that mouth had felt on his skin – and how it had made him feel, dammit - made Tommy’s anger only burn brighter.

“Talk?” he sneered.  “You sneak up to me from behind, nearly get me off right in the middle of the fucking dance floor, and now you want to talk?  Did Adam send you, or what?  I don’t know what fucking game you’re playing, Sauli, but—“  He was sputtering, words failing him.  Shaking with emotion, he reached for the door handle, only wanting to get away.

Sauli leaned toward him, caught his wrist and held him back.  “Adam doesn’t know I’m here.  Please, Tommy.  You have to believe me.  I—I left him, just like you did.”  His voice broke on the last sentence, he obviously was telling the truth, Tommy thought.  But still.

“I didn’t leave _him_ ,” he said.  “We weren’t together in the first place.”

Sauli gave a little, bitter laugh.  “Maybe that was the problem.”

“Adam and I, that was fan service, nothing more.  You know that!” Tommy protested.  “Besides, I’m not gay.”

“Is that so?”  Sauli shot back.  “Then what were you doing tonight, letting yourself be groped by a stranger in a gay bar?  You’d have let me jack you off right there with everyone watching.  Maybe you’re not gay, but you’re not so very straight, either.”

Uncomfortable with where this was going, Tommy changed tack.  “So why did you leave him?”

Sauli averted his gaze, taking a deep breath.  When the words came they were slow, like pebbles falling into a chasm one by one.  “Because of you.”

“Because of me?” Tommy echoed.  “But Sauli, you know I’ve never—“

Sauli interrupted him, looking pained.  “He cancelled the whole damned tour when you disappeared!  I mean, I knew music was more important to him than I was, and I’ve always accepted that, but all of a sudden you were the only thing that counted anymore.”

Unbelieving, Tommy watched silent tears run down Sauli’s face.  His own anger taking a back seat, he took Sauli’s hand.  The other man’s fingers were icy in his and slightly trembling.  _Nerves_ , Tommy thought, _and it is cold in here, wet and half-naked as we are._

Loud he said, “But you know how Adam is, always going for lost causes.  I only became important to him when I was gone.  It’s you he loves, and you’re stupid to doubt him.  Come on Sauli, let me get out of this car, and then you go back to where you belong.”

Sauli was silent for a long time, before he shook his head.  “No.  I can’t just go back.  Things can’t be like before.  I’m sick and tired of your ghost looming over my bed.”

He took the cloth that had fallen in his lap, and wiped the windscreen clear with jerky, angry moves.  And then, all of a sudden, he started the car and floored it.  “Fasten your seat belt!“ he shouted against the roar of the machine.

“Fuck!  What are you doing?” Tommy yelled, hurrying to buckle up.

Sauli didn’t reply.  Lips pressed together closely, he careened through the mostly empty streets like a man possessed.  Tommy could only cling to his seat, closer to praying than he’d been in the last twenty or so years.  It was almost a relief when suddenly a police car veered out behind them, blue lights flashing through the night and sirens rending the air.

Cursing a blue streak, Sauli hit the brakes.  “Oh, crikey.”

 _Crikey?_   High with adrenaline, Tommy couldn’t suppress a giggle.  “I’m gonna teach you some swearwords,” he muttered at the pale man next to him, just as an officer rapped his knuckles against the front side window.  Sauli pushed the button and the window went down.

“Your driver’s license, please.”

Sauli paled even more.  “I don’t have it with me,” he almost whispered.

The officer’s eyes narrowed.  “Get out, both of you.  Face to the car, hands on the roof.”

They both complied slowly, ending up facing each other over the car’s roof, the heavy rain pouring down on them, while one officer patted them down and his colleague fast-talked into his radio device.

“I’m sorry,” Sauli mouthed at Tommy, looking so crestfallen that Tommy couldn’t help but feel sorry for him, too.  Slowly, as not to alert the officers, he pushed his right hand across the hard top to take Sauli’s, just like he had in the car, only minutes ago.

“Don’t worry, okay?  It’s just speeding, they’re gonna let us go.”

Sauli shook his head.  “I don’t care if I go to jail.  It’s…  Fuck, I’ve messed everything up.  I was going to get you back to Adam, throw you into his bed and…”  He broke off, suppressing a sob.

“Throw me into Adam’s bed?”  Tommy couldn’t wrap his mind around the craziness of that.  “Are you nuts?  What did you think would happen?”

“Shut up, you two!” the officer barked, and Sauli, who had been about to reply, clamped his mouth shut.

An hour or so later, they found themselves in a holding cell, freezing and miserable, squabbling over who to make their call to.  Predictably, Sauli prevailed.  Tommy waited in the cell, squatting on the hard wooden bench, his face buried in his hands.  When Sauli returned, he sat down next to Tommy, their shoulders touching.  Sauli’s skin was clammy, and Tommy could feel small shivers run through the other man’s body.  Without stopping to think he put an arm around him and pulled him into a hug.  And then they waited.


	4. Chapter 4

It seemed like they were sitting there for an eternity, waiting.  The alcohol was finally starting to take its toll on Tommy, and he felt himself drift away and fall into some kind of half-sleep, always aware of Sauli’s trembling body so close to his own.

When the cell door was yanked open and they were led out through the narrow corridor, he could only stumble along bleary-eyed.  Sauli had his hand in a death-grip, somehow managing to push Tommy along while at the same time half-hiding behind him.

His heart skipped a beat when he saw Adam standing there, pale in the harsh neon light.  Tommy thought he was looking worn, but except for that his face was unreadable.  He hadn’t looked at them yet, and Tommy was dreading that moment as much as he anticipated it.  He hated feeling that way; it was one of the reasons he’d gone.

The officer made Adam sign for them like for some delivery.  Only when he had completed the forms did Adam’s gaze flip toward them.  For the fracture of a second he seemed utterly relieved to see them, but then he zoomed in on Tommy’s naked chest, and on Sauli’s, and his eyes turned an icy gray as he turned around and walked out on them without a single word.  For a moment Tommy stood frozen, and it was up to Sauli to push him after Adam once more.

His posture rigid, Adam proceeded to his Mustang, Sauli and Tommy trailing after him.  Tommy felt like that one time where he’d been caught smoking shit behind the bleachers and his parents had to come to get him from school, guilty and defiant at the same time.

Sauli had been clinging to him with a death-grip, his hands icy on Tommy’s arm.  Now he let go and walked around the car toward Adam.  He approached him slowly, carefully, seemingly poised for flight.  _As if he is walking up to a tiger._   Visible steeling himself, Sauli laid a hand on Adam’s back.

“I’m sorry, Adam,” Tommy heard him whisper, “so, so sorry!  I was just trying to put things right!”  With a stifled sigh, Adam looked up at the sky, as if asking for heavenly guidance.  He had to have received a kind of answer, ‘cause a moment later he rolled his eyes, turned around and pulled Sauli into a firm embrace as if he wanted to protect him from all the evils of a cold world.  No accusations, no word of reproach, and the distant expression on Adam’s face had completely disappeared, too, leaving not the faintest trace.  Instead Adam had closed his eyes, and seemed to be breathing in the scent of Sauli’s hair.

They looked so right together.  So in love.  It hurt to watch them.

Silently, Tommy took a step backward, away from them.  Then another.  They didn’t look at him at all.  For a few seconds he hovered in place, his eyes starting to burn with an overwhelming emotion, but then he tore himself away and turned around to walk away once more.  It was harder, the second time around.

He didn’t even know where he was going, but he walked faster and faster, until he fell in a kind of jog.  Anything to get away from the picture of the two of them in each other’s arms.  _And a happy fucking birthday to you, Ratliff_.

He was running now, barely noticing the cold anymore.  His face was wet; he didn’t know if from tears or from the rain that kept coming at him.  Even though he was blinking constantly, his sight remained blurred, so that when a black car veered onto the pavement in front of him, cutting off his way, he reacted way too late and barged into it with a bang.

The passenger door opened and an arm reached for him, forcefully dragging him in.  With a surprised yelp he landed in Sauli’s lap, managing to bang both his knees and an elbow in the process.  And then the door slammed shut.

Sauli scooted over to the side, making room for him, and Tommy dropped on the seat, wide-eyed and panting.  Sighing, Adam pulled a thick rug forth from the backseat and Sauli wrapped it around Tommy and himself.

There was a strange silence in the car, punctuated only by Tommy’s ragged breathing; even the purr of the engine seemed to come from far, far away.  It was early morning, just getting light, and the streets were so deserted they appeared foreign to Tommy.  If Sauli had told him they were stranded in an alternate universe he would have believed him in a heartbeat.  Adam and Sauli were talking quietly, but he couldn’t muster the concentration to really listen.  His mind was still busy digesting the concept that they had gone after him.

After a while, the car stopped.  Tommy recognized Adam’s driveway.  Why had they taken him here, and not back to his own flat?

“Guys—“ he muttered, but Adam had already gone ahead and was fiddling with the front door, and Sauli just shushed him and guided him out of the car and into Adam’s house that smelled of salty, buttered popcorn and him.  And then into Adam’s bathroom, with the huge shower stall.  Adam embraced Tommy from behind, while Sauli worked off his boots and the soggy black jeans.  And then the three of them were naked under the spray of hot water, gentle hands rubbing him warm and clean, while Tommy kept his eyes carefully closed, not ready for the reality of who was touching him.

It was an enigma to him from where his weary body dragged the energy for an erection, but it happened, embarrassingly fast.  The giggle he heard had to be Sauli’s he decided, but the warm, big hand on his cock…  _Oh God,_ he thought, _please let it be his.  Let it be Adam’s._   But he didn’t dare look.

His knees buckled.  Experiencing a strong sense of déjà vu he let himself teeter backward, barely daring to hope it wouldn’t be cold, hard tiles that met him.  It weren’t.  He fell into the embrace of two hot, wet bodies, slick with the thyme and honey shower gel he’d smelled on Adam so often when they’d kissed on stage.

Two hard cocks were nudging his ass, in the same rhythm as the hand that kept jacking him at a leisurely pace.  Another hand had crept down his belly and was now cradling his balls, rolling them around gently.  He let his head fall back in capitulation, sighing as he did so, and reached behind himself to catch those insistent erections.

Matching groans from both sides were his reward, breathing that turned heavy against the sensitive skin of his neck.  It was exhilarating.  It had to be a dream.  Probably he had fallen asleep and was still in the holding cell, because this?  This couldn’t be happening.  But if it was a dream—why not make the most of it and let go?

With a groan he pushed into the hand, urging it to tighten the grip, to go faster.  A needy whine escaped from his throat, and he thought that it possibly couldn’t be him, making that sound, but then he was already tensing up all over and seconds his body shook in the throes of an orgasm that left him utterly weak.

When it was over he nearly collapsed, but two sets of arms held him up.  They quickly patted him dry and put him to bed.  On a wide, comfortable mattress that was easily big enough for three.  A fluffy comforter was spread over him and tucked in at the corners, all so gently and carefully, he couldn’t get his mind around it.

The curtains were closed in the bedroom, keeping the daylight out.  Only a couple of small, sparkling LEDs in the ceiling cast a faint, bluish light.  Somehow somebody had dragged him from that roller-coaster to deposit him right into one of the gondolas of Peter Pan’s Flight.

His lids were getting heavier, but nothing could have stopped him from watching Adam going down on Sauli, right in front of him.  Sauli was lying on his back, looking boneless like a cat, his legs spread lasciviously with Adam settled between them.  His hands were on Adam’s head, holding him in place as he fucked up into the heat of his eager mouth.

Adam was moaning, too.  Heat spread once more through Tommy’s whole body as he watched Adam suck Sauli off while at the same time humping the mattress rhythmically.

Sauli came first.  With a mewling whine he jerked under Adam’s ministrations, flopping like a stranded fish.  Tommy’s eyes were glued to them, so he saw how Adam, at the exact moment he swallowed Sauli’s come down, tensed up and peaked, too, with a small shudder.

Satisfied, Tommy watched them come back to earth.  The little smile he couldn’t keep from escaping turned wider as two warm bodies clambered under the sheets, framing him closely.  Sauli was smiling at him, madly so, but when Tommy turned around he found Adam regarding him almost warily.

 _He’s afraid,_ Tommy realized.  _Afraid I’ll run from him again._   It was a heady thought, and it gave him the courage to reach over and pull Adam in for a deep, searching kiss.  It felt like coming home, but also fresh and new.  He could taste Sauli in there, too, and found that he didn’t mind it one bit.  Quite the opposite.

“I knew it,” Sauli said, smugly, when they pulled apart.

“What did you know, you crazy Fin?” Tommy asked.

“That if I just got you into our bed, things would work out all by themselves.  I knew it the moment you leaned back against me at the club.”

“About that,” Adam said, “would you two mind filling me in?  I’d love to know what went on between you two.  Must have been quite the evening.”

Tommy couldn’t stop a little smirk from escaping.  “Sure was.  The best birthday present I ever got.  But that’s a story for another day.  Right now, I only want to sleep.”

“Well, okay,” Adam said.  “I guess we’ll all be here in the morning.”  He narrowed his eyes at Tommy and Sauli.  “We will, won’t we?”

Sauli nodded emphatically.  Adam waited for Tommy’s reply.  It seemed like he was holding his breath.

Tommy smiled.  There were no doubts in his heart.  Not anymore.

“Yeah,” he said to Adam.  “I’m done running.”

This was where he belonged.  This new decade was going to be awesome.


End file.
